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Sie wollen wissen, worum es in meinem neuen Kabarettprogramm geht? Ich muss sie enttäuschen. Ich kann ihnen doch heute noch nicht sagen, was ich morgen für eine Nummer spielen werde. Vielleicht lästere ich heute über Milchalternativen und morgen attestiert man mir eine Lactoseunverträglichkeit. Vielleicht mache ich mich heute übers Gendern lustig und morgen fühle ich mich als Hortensie im Körper einer Orchidee. Vielleicht klebe ich mich heute öffentlich auf die Bundesstraße und morgen geh ich privat mit meiner Mama auf Kreuzfahrt durchs Mittelmeer.
Ich sollte aber vorsichtshalber eine Triggerwarnung aussprechen. Denn irgendetwas in diesem Programm wird mit Sicherheit Gefühle verletzen. Seien es meine absurden Beobachtungen aus dem alltäglichen Leben, wiedergegeben in meiner ländlich-rustikalen Art oder die eine italienische Arie, die Sie an Ihre Zangengeburt erinnern lässt.
Wenn Sie mich fragen, gleicht Kabarett und Comedy sowieso mehr einer Personenwahl. Entweder Sie können mich leiden und wir verbringen gemeinsam einen schönen Abend oder Sie können mich eben nicht leiden und schicken mir Ihre Schwiegermutter. Wie man es dreht oder wendet: Wahrscheinlich liegt’s an mir!
Einlass: 19:00 Uhr
Hier keine Tickets verfügbarYou want to know what my new cabaret program is about? I have to disappoint you. I can't tell you today what act I'll be performing tomorrow. Maybe today I'll gossip about milk alternatives, and tomorrow they'll diagnose me with lactose intolerance. Perhaps today I'll mock gendering, and tomorrow I'll feel like a hydrangea in the body of an orchid. Maybe today I'll publicly glue myself to the federal highway, and tomorrow I'll privately go on a cruise with my mom in the Mediterranean.
I should probably issue a trigger warning just in case. Because something in this program is bound to hurt feelings. Whether it's my absurd observations from everyday life, delivered in my rural-rustic manner, or that one Italian aria that reminds you of your forceps delivery.
If you ask me, cabaret and comedy are more like a personal choice anyway. Either you like me and we'll spend a nice evening together, or you don't like me and send me your mother-in-law. However you look at it: It's probably my fault!
…Speaking of cruises, I've reached thirty and still don't know where the journey is headed. I probably should be woke. Instead, I first have to Google how to spell it. I'm as annoyed by all these fanatical world improvers as I am by those who couldn't care less. You can already tell, it's not going to get very concrete. If you still don't want to buy a cat in a nightgown, I understand. Maybe it will help you if I say what you cannot expect from this program. I will not sing the latest hit by Michael Wendler. I will not fry scrambled eggs on stage. I will not ask for your phone number. The only question that genuinely interests me right now is: Does Mozart even know about the balls?
Oh, I should probably issue a trigger warning just to be safe. Because something in this program will definitely hurt feelings. Whether it’s my absurd observations from everyday life, expressed in my rural-rustic style, or that one Italian aria that reminds you of your forceps birth. If you ask me, cabaret and comedy are more like a matter of personal preference anyway. Either you like me and we’ll have a nice evening together, or you don’t like me and send me your mother-in-law. No matter how you turn it: Probably it's my fault!
...Speaking of cruises, I've now reached thirty and still don't know where the journey is headed. Probably I should be woke. Instead, I first have to google how to even spell that. These fanatical world improvers annoy me just as much as those who couldn't care less. You can already tell, it won't get very concrete. However, if you don’t want to buy a cat in pajamas, I understand that. Maybe it helps you if I say what you can't expect from this program. I will not sing the latest hit from Michael Wendler. I will not fry scrambled eggs on stage. I will not ask for your phone number. The only question that currently really burns in my mind is: Does Mozart even know about the balls?
Oh, but I should issue a trigger warning just in case. Because something in this program will definitely hurt feelings. Be it my absurd observations from everyday life, conveyed in my rural-rustic manner, or the one Italian aria that reminds you of your forceps delivery. If you ask me, cabaret and comedy are more like a choice of person anyway. Either you can stand me and we will have a nice evening together, or you can't stand me and send me your mother-in-law. No matter how you turn it: Probably it’s me!
Hallo, ich bin Maya.
